Clay Aiken ran for Congress in North Carolina. But he didn't make it. Clay Aiken is famous for coming in second in a TV popularity contest that most people got fed up with years ago. He also lost on 'American Idol.'

Tomorrow is your future's yesterday.

The most popular Valentine's Day gift is chocolate. In the 1800's, doctors told their patients to eat chocolate to get over a broken heart. They also thought if you're going to be alone, who cares if you get fat.

New iPod. It looks like an iPhone but it can't make phone calls. So its really just an iPhone.

I like football. I find its an exciting strategic game. Its a great way to avoid conversation with your family at Thanksgiving.

You know, I think there's a good rule of thumb here: Don't take nutritional advice from other species.

When I stopped drinking, it was only because I thought if I don't stop, I'm going to die.