I don't like the whole blowing the candles out ritual... blowing their germs all over the cake. If I want to catch something on my birthday. I don't want it to be from the cake. If you know what I'm saying.

My father had a very unusual psychic ability, he could detect water. It's called divining. He would use a Y-shaped U-branch, and he could find water with that, which is a very impressive skill in a country where it rains 365 days of the year.

There is no Thanksgiving back in the old country where I come from. You know why? Because being thankful is a sin.

I've been running my whole life. Running into bars, running around the world. But when you have a child, you can't run. That was a revelation.

Aphrodisiacs come in many forms: food, drink, the internet.

Oh Satan you're a wily one.

The difference between a broadcaster and a host is that a host tells stories and dumb jokes, but a broadcaster can articulate deeper like, you know - things and stuff.