There's going to be a new cable-TV channel for dogs. Dogs don't even watch TV. But the schedule came out today. And they've got great shows, like Barks & Recreation and Game of Bones.

I found out it is just as hard to make a movie that you are not proud of as it is to make one you love.

If you absolutely believe that what you do is right, you're bullet-proof.

President Obama announced his re-election campaign, though it’s not really a surprise. He did all the things that make it official: He filed the paperwork, redesigned his website, and printed another fake birth certificate.

I knew that I had been partially right in the storeroom above the bar on Christmas Day. Whoever I had become had to die.

By the power of Steven Wright's Beard!

On that same tour we ran into a band at Aylesbury Friars, a biggish venue in Oxfordshire, England. They were a four-piece from Ireland called U2. They seemed like nice fellows and they sounded pretty good, but we didn’t keep in touch. They’re probably taxi drivers and accountants by now.