Maria Shriver is credited with helping Arnold win by standing by him despite allegations of groping. She had to stand by him cause Arnold had a vice grip on her left ass cheek.

I don't do well around the angry, bitter and emotionally fragile among us, which may eliminate 70% of the population.

President Bush announced a billion dollar mission to the moon and Mars. He came up with a snappy new slogan - to drill where no man has drilled before.

George W. Bush even stopped in Pennsylvania to try his hand at the lotto and gave up when he could only think of the numbers 4 and 17

A study shows breast implants can cause nausea and dizziness... from all the free drinks.

I lived in a studio apartment until my mid-30s. I don't have an extravagant lifestyle.

California's economy is declining so rapidly that candidates are asking 'Are you better off now then you were four minutes ago?'