Bush said the unemployment situation is turning around. Last week alone, 5,000 people started working for John Kerry.

The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.

There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, 'I do.'

There has been no electricity in Baghdad for a week and the people are angry. You would be angry too if you couldn't watch your brand new stolen TV.

I don't do well around the angry, bitter and emotionally fragile among us, which may eliminate 70% of the population.

President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one.

Maria Shriver is credited with helping Arnold win by standing by him despite allegations of groping. She had to stand by him cause Arnold had a vice grip on her left ass cheek.