Larry Flynt, running for governor of California. His goal - change our state bird to the spread eagle.

Bush said the unemployment situation is turning around. Last week alone, 5,000 people started working for John Kerry.

In Massachusetts, scientists have created the first human clone. The bad thing is that in thirty years, the clone will still be depressed because the Boston Red Sox will still have not won a World Series.

Did you see the statue topple? Bill Clinton got nostalgic seeing something that big in a beret go down.

I lived in a studio apartment until my mid-30s. I don't have an extravagant lifestyle.

California's economy is declining so rapidly that candidates are asking 'Are you better off now then you were four minutes ago?'

The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.