Dogs act exactly the way we would act if we had no shame.

You can't take away knowledge, and it's dangerous to pretend you never had it.

There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth.

With dogs, you don't need gurus. Dogs are forever in the moment. They are always a tidal wave of feelings, and every feeling is some variant of love.

You love somebody, and then you don't love them anymore. But if you really love somebody, you always love them, don't you? Isn't there always some small part of you that reads their horoscope in the paper everyday?

Swingers are all from the suburbs and consequently brain-addled by car pools, shopping malls, and welcome wagons.

One does not have to sleep with, or even touch, someone who has paid for your meal. All those obligations are hereby rendered null and void, and any man who doesn't think so needs a quick jab in the kidney.