Beer. Now there's a temporary solution!

English? Who needs to spend time learning that? I'm never going to England!

After years of doing it, you learn the difference between your ego and your opinion. When you're married you have to cut through that.

If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling, foxy boxing, and such and such.

How I imagined myself being 50 is not how I am feeling now. You think you'll be different, but I still feel like I am about 12 years old - mentally, not physically.

To many, Homer may appear lazy and a loser, but he's just much misguided. He's boorish, sure, but well meaning and, I guess, the one thing we have in common is the pursuit of lousy diets.

Although I don't get the parts in films or other television shows that would be befitting of a huge, international star, I don't have to worry about walking around on the street or eating at a restaurant. Occasionally, you do get recognized a little bit. And that's fine. Most people are pretty cool about it. That's the thing - it's such a low-key thing that I can still enjoy it and not worry about it.