I was playing the game where I was going to be a great TV or film writer some day and there was nothing else that I thought about, including other people.

If somebody's cat happens to turn on the TV, my numbers can double. It's almost unrelated to what's really happening.

I'd just love to sit at home, wake up at 10AM, go to my own office with my dog, and write a movie. I don't know if I'm capable of doing that though. I think I'll just end up playing Minecraft and self-destructing.

I'm from Wisconsin so I always feel a little nauseous about begging and trying to trick people into liking me.

Find your voice, shout it from the rooftops, and keep doing it until the people that are looking for you find you.

When you are in the 8 o'clock position, you can either be a cultural phenomenon, or you're endangered. It's a tough time slot.

My cat brought me a toy. I thanked her and threw it. She sat there gave me a look that made me realize people and dogs are the crazy ones.