The term SAT is a set of initials, or autonym, standing for Scholastic Attitude Treaty Organization.

You cannot paint the exterior of your house. You have to take the paint chip down to show the paint-chip Nazis.

Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring giant billowing clouds of smoke, hot rocks raining from the sky, lava floes destroying entire villages, etc., and the teenager, eyebrows arched with sarcasm, will look at you and say, "Gee, this is swell," then return to the rental car, turn on his portable CD player, and listen to a band called Stomach Contents.

There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you finally see what goes on underwater,you realize that you've been missing the whole point of the ocean. Staying on the surface all the time is like going to the circus and staring at the outside of the tent.

Motto of the U.S. airline industry - "We're Hoping to Have a Motto Announcement in About an Hour."

A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.

What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another person, especially if he has had between four and seven beers.