Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money.

The central point of this final chapter is that - follow my logic carefully here - unless you die, you will continue to get older. (It's insights like this that separate the professional book author from the person with a real job.)

Too many bugs and leeches and spiders and spiderwebs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests.

And what is the Scientific Community doing about these problems, young people? THEY'RE CLONING SHEEP. Great! Just what we need! Sheep that look MORE ALIKE than they already do! Thanks a lot, Scientific Community!

The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.

Editorials are written by people who have agreed to have several strong opinions a day and to write them down, provided they do not have to sign their names.

If Black Stache laughed, you laughed. If he snarled, you snarled. If he breathed in your direction, you ran for cover.