Each year, millions of skiers come to Colorado to experience its superb emergency medical facilities.

The Internet is a giant international network of intelligent, informed computer enthusiasts, by which I mean, "people without lives." We don't care. We have each other.... While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Internet are exchanging, freely and openly, the most settings, uninhibited, intimate and, yes, shocking details about our "CONFIG.SYS."

I believe many Harley guys spend more time revving their engines than actually driving anywhere; I sometimes wonder why they bother to have wheels on their motorcycles.

If the people in Europe are SOOOOOO smart, how come so many of them can't seem to locate the deodorant, huh?

Chair lifts need to be in some places so that we can get to wonderful views without having to hike to them.

Greyhound Bus Lines motto: "We Stop For Some Damn Thing Every 200 Yards."

Today's beauty ideal, strictly enforced by the media, is a person with the same level of body fat as a paper clip.