Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.
Dave BarryLike many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art.
Dave BarryThis nation is so friendly that the leading cause of injury is getting passionately embraced by strangers.
Dave BarryThe issue we are reluctant to talk about is even more sensitive than condoms. The issue - and I will try to be tasteful here - is that sometimes it seems like maybe the president of the United States is kind of dumb. If you get what I mean. What I mean is, I am not totally confident that the president would get what I mean, unless several aides explained it to him. And even then, he might forget.
Dave Barry