The president, apparently, was so totally unaware of where his foreign policy was that he had to appoint a distinguished commission to help him locate it, and when the commissioners called him in to testify, he told them, essentially, that he couldn't remember what it looked like. Now, if Richard Nixon had claimed something like that you would at least have had the comfort of knowing he was lying. You could trust Nixon that way. But with this president, you have this nagging feeling that he's telling the truth.
Dave BarryMagnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.
Dave BarryIf the security personnel do their job properly, they just might cause you to miss your plane, thereby possibly saving your life.
Dave BarryWhat gets me is, I waited in line for an hour to do this. I could have experienced essentially the same level of enjoyment merely by sticking my finger down my throat.
Dave Barry