Never trust anything you read in a travel article.

Today's toys contain computer chips, so they can move and talk; this stimulates the mind of your child. Notice I say "your child." MY child just wants to eat the toys.

As you know, birds do not have sexual organs because they would interfere with flight.

I know that all over America there's probably politicians sending out pictures of themselves signing that mandatory helmet bill, but it's bullshit. I say that as a parent.

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admit that we know of no better system, except possibly flipping a coin.

Florida's number three industry, behind tourism and skin cancer, is voter fraud.

I like golf because you can be really terrible at it, and still not look much dorkier than anybody else.