Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.

The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.

Unlike cats dogs never scratch you when you wash them. They just become very sad and try to figure out what they did wrong.

Back then, the entire Internet consisted of two slow, boxcar-sized UNIVAC computers about 50 feet apart, connected by a wire. It would take one of these computers an entire day to send an email to the other one, which would immediately delete it, because it was a Viagra ad.

Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.