American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

I was reading this James Bond book, and right away I realized that, like most books, it had too many words.

If you answered, ''Spin the Bottle,'' then I frankly do not want to know any more about your childhood.

Ask any real estate broker to name the three most important factors in buying a property, and he'll say: "Location, location, location." Now ask him to name the chief justice of the United States Supreme Court, and he'll say: "Location, location, location." This tells us that we should not necessarily be paying a whole lot of attention to real estate brokers.

Sign at a New England church: Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished?

When to arrive at the airport?: You should be at the airport already.

When I was a kid, I thought history was the most boring subject of all. I shouldn't blame my teachers; I should blame me, but I'll blame them.