Back then, the entire Internet consisted of two slow, boxcar-sized UNIVAC computers about 50 feet apart, connected by a wire. It would take one of these computers an entire day to send an email to the other one, which would immediately delete it, because it was a Viagra ad.

The books all say that barracuda rarely eat people, but very few barracuda can read.

I still think of myself as a newspaper guy and you live by deadlines in the newspaper world, so, they don't really give you any excuses. At the paper they never say, "Well, we just won't have Tuesday's paper come out, we'll just bring Tuesday's paper out on Wednesday, so go ahead, take all the time you need." They come out with that paper regardless.

More and more products are coming out in fiercely protective packaging designed to prevent consumers from consuming them. These days you have to open almost every consumer item by gnawing on the packaging.

Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill.

I never start a section of the story without knowing how it will end. I also consciously try to shape the story as though it were a movie.

The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitution - 'to spew out paper.'