The world can't tell you who you are. You've just got to figure out who you are and be there, for better or worse.

I don't do drugs, though. Just weed.

I support anyone's right to be who they want to be. My question is: to what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?

What did the 5 fingers say to the face. S L A P!

I love being famous - it's phenomenal.

The way the people around you position themselves around you to get in your pockets and in your mind is infuriating to me.

I'm Dave Chappelle and I'm a chronic masturbator.