If you want to reinstate the 14.4 billion dollars that Bush cut out of the veterans program then vote democrat.

Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English.

I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.

There are really funny alternative comics and really funny straight comics who write and perform traditionally.

There were a number of referendums in '98 that most of the things I voted for passed. That's very satisfying when you feel that most of the country is in step with your views.

You cannot win a War on Terrorism. It's like having a war on jealousy.

If you want to reinstate the 14.4 billion dollars that Bush cut out of the veterans program then vote democrat.