Today, the L.A. Times accused Arnold Schwarzenegger of groping six women. I'm telling ya, this guy is presidential material.

Holyfield won the fight. It's not the first time Romney has been knocked out by a black guy.

Barack Obama's busy moving into the White House. Earlier today, John McCain was blowing on his soup.

Mayor de Blasio said that whenever he goes to a Yankee game he gets sick and tired of people booing and giving him the finger. Hey, what do you want? You're the mayor of New York City. It comes with the gig, pal.

The White House is saying Donald Trump has 'zero percent chance' of being elected. Isn't that a little high?

The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade has new balloons this year including the Pillsbury Doughboy balloon and the first openly gay balloon. Also the Thomas Tank Engine balloon, and they even have the Ebola nurse balloon.

I'll be honest with you. It's beginning to look like I'm not going to get 'The Tonight Show.'