I've been lucky enough to win an Oscar, write a best-seller - my other dream would be to have a painting in the Louvre. The only way that's going to happen is if I paint a dirty one on the wall of the gentlemen's lavatory.

You can count on Errol Flynn, he'll always let you down.

If you could do something that would make people happy, and it would cost you neither money nor time, would you do it? If that same thing made you happy, would you do it? What is this magical thing that will brighten your day and the days of people around you and yet cost you nothing? A smile.

Tell me that I misunderstood a joke, but don't tell me that my choice of cravat is wrong.

I've been lucky enough to win an Oscar, write a best-seller - my other dream would be to have a painting in the Louvre. The only way that's going to happen is if I paint a dirty one on the wall of the gentlemen's lavatory.

Do something today that reflects who you are, what you are capable of, what you care about. Give yourself plenty of evidence of what you can do, and you will not doubt your abilities to do anything.

Tomorrow, Trubshawe, I am going to get married again, thereby quite possibly making the greatest mistake of my life.