I like nonfiction books about people with wretched lives.

The only real advice you can give anyone is to keep writing.

I can't seem to fathom that the things important to me are not important to other people as well, and so I come off sounding like a missionary, someone whose job it is to convert rather than listen.

It was my friend Frank, a writer in San Francisco, who finally set me straight. When asked about my new look he put down his fork and stared at me for a few moments. "A bow tie announces to the world you can no longer get an erection."

I sometimes read books on my iPad.

They were Jesuits," she told me. "That means they believe in God but not in terlet paper. You should have seen their underwear. Disgusting.

Sometimes I say to myself, 'Oh, I wish I could win a Tony Award', although I'm not that bothered.