I take the juice of two bottles of whisky.

We try to find chemistry; we don't do a lot of situational baseball.

Brother, you can't go to jail for what you're thinking, or that look in your eye, just standing on the corner watching all the girls go by.

When your opponent's sittin' there holdin' all the aces, there's only one thing to do: kick over the table.

Haven't got a girl, but I can wish. So I'll take me down to Main Street and that's where I'll select my imaginary dish.

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show business. Hard work, perseverance, and discipline: all the things you need...when you have no talent.

I know it's the gentlemanly thing to let the wife file. But, then, everybody knows I'm no gentleman.