Sometimes 'great acting' is just showing off - chewing up scenery and dialogue and other actors - the equivalent of a theatrical sugar rush.

You get to a certain point, especially if you're a comedian, where people think certain things. It's like, I don't take the time to explain it to people, it's just part of what I do.

No woman can be completely happy at any one moment in time. They're always anticipating the next thing to argue or complain about.

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own ass, okay?

I would have to commit a crime and have cops chase me. That would be the only way to get me to jog five miles.

I like Jesus, I mean, I think he was a good guy.

Not eating meat is a decision, eating meat is an instinct.