We are simultaneously the most hated, loved, feared and admired nation on this planet. In short, we are Frank Sinatra.

Technology is fine. . ., but that popular vision of the future, where you plug somebody in and leave them there and they don't get out and interact with actual flesh-and-blood humans - you know the answer before I say it - that's not good.

Now I don't have anything against Mexican people, but for God's sakes, sign the gust book on the way in.

I think abortion's wrong, but it's none of my business to tell somebody what's wrong, he said. So I'm pro-choice. I want to keep my nose out of other people's personal business. I guess I fall into conservative when it comes to protecting the United States in a world where a lot of people hate the United States.

I don't have credibility, I'm a comedian. I'm not Ed Murrow up on the roof in a London fog reporting on the blitz.

Dennis Kucinich's politics are more scrambled than Rod Steiger's dream journal.

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home.