It's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time; yet nothing terrifies us more than the thought of eternity.

That punt was higher than Marion Berry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena.

The Democrats continue to snipe at Bush. They'll never give it up to him. You know Teddy Kennedy and Tom Daschle pick more nits than a father and son spider monkey team who know they're being followed by a National Geographic film crew.

Americans stick their nose where it doesn't belong more than Cyrano de Bergerac giving head.

I'm a tad paranoid. I think the person in front of me is following me the long way round.

In the late twentieth century, staying sober has become just as much an addiction as getting wasted.

That secondary provides worse coverage than a Guatemalan HMO.