There were several things a Yale freshman was supposed to be able to do. You had to demonstrate in the Olympic-size Yale pool that you could swim 50 yards or be inducted into swimming class.

It's a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear.

The Nixon administration kept a nasty eye on our show... Cops would come by - often just in time to see the act they wanted to see.

History is not reassuring on the subject of the longevity of seemingly lasting great nations, is it?

I haven't ever found any great writing on that wonderful and often unappreciated art form, the insult.

Anyone working in the media can tell you that there seems to be an always-ready-to-explode segment of the populace for whom offense is a fate worse than anything imaginable. You'd think offense is one of the most calamitous things that could happen to a human being; right up there with the loss of a limb, or just missing a parking space.

You have to be on TV a surprisingly long time before you're stopped on the street. Then, when you are, you get a lot of, 'Hey, you're great! What's your name again?'