To me, seeing a really great comedian is a bit like watching a musician or a poet.
I won't say I'm out of condition now - but I even puff going downstairs.
America has the mightiest military on the planet, and they didn't get there with entertainers.
Audiences feel no hatred from me. Because I'm not bitter.
Eating liver out of a cow's body is like eating the filter out of a car.
You hear entertainers all the time, saying, 'If I couldn't get paid for this, I'd do it for free.' When's the last time you ever heard a business person say, 'If I couldn't get paid for being chairman of British Petroleum, I'd do it for free'?