Intellectuals should never marry; they won't enjoy it; and besides, they should not reproduce themselves.

[Reviewing a production of Uncle Tom's Cabin] The dogs were poorly supported by the cast.

About the time we get old enough to be as wicked as we want to be, we don't want to be so very wicked after all.

I had, out of my sixty teachers, a scant half dozen who couldn't have been supplanted by phonographs.

Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.

I wish I could stand on a busy corner, hat in hand and beg people to throw me all their wasted hours. If all you can see is your shadow, you're blocking your own light. If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.

If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.