An optimist is the person who has never had any experience at all.

The art of newspaper paragraphing is to stroke a platitude until it purrs like an epigram.

Persian pussy from over the sea demure and lazy and smug and fat none of your ribbons and bells for me ours is the zest of the alley cat

I do not see why men sheould be so proud insects have the more ancient lineage according to the scientists insects were insects when man was only a burbling whatisit.

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

There is always a comforting thought in time of trouble when it is not our trouble.

Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.