I'm trying hard not to use a specific reference, but you'll probably know it's you after the first sentence.

I feel like guys don't think it's cool to use emojis. I'm like, that's so whack. Emojis help so much. They really do give context to something.

We had a teacher, named Mr. Brown, and he was writing something on the board once - he was writing something on the board, and he farted. And you would have thought kids had seen the face of God. Kids weren't even laughing; they were just sitting there screaming, just screaming. Kids had to get carted out; kids were screaming. Kids had to get carted out, and they were going to the nurses' office. Kids are crying in the hallway. 'Oh, this is our 9/11.' And it was. It was their 9/11 'cause they never thought anything like that could ever happen.

I hate it when you really think you're getting something good... and you don't listen to your dudes when you really should.

I think it's a comedian's job to make everything funny. Nothing is off-limits.

Kept looking for something to be in with. Follow someone's blueprint. But you have to be on your own.

Also, I realized a lot of kids are listening to me. Whether I want to be or not, they're looking up to me.