For a few minutes, everything is so cute that the mind reels.... And then, believe it or not, things get worse. So I shot myself.

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.

Accursed from their birth they be Who seek to find monogamy, Pursuing it from bed to bed— I think they would be better dead.

Benchley and I had an office in the old Life magazine that was so tiny, if it were an inch smaller it would have been adultery.

I never see that prettiest thing- A cherry bough gone white with Spring- But what I think, "How gay 'twould be To hang me from a flowering tree.

I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.