Mrs. Ewing was a short woman who accepted the obligation borne by so many short women to make up in vivacity what they lack in number of inches from the ground.

Just begin a story with such a phrase as 'I remember Disraeli - poor old Dizz! - once saying to me, in answer to my poke in the eye,' and you will find me and Morpheus off in a corner, necking.

[On an actor who'd broken her leg in London:] Oh, how terrible. She must have done it sliding down a barrister.

The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.

If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised.

If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they're happy.

Sometimes I think I'll give up trying, and just go completely Russian and sit on a stove and moan all day.