... if this world were anything near what it should be there would be no more need of a Book Week than there would be a of a Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.

I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.

Yet, as only New Yorkers know, if you can get through the twilight, you'll live through the night.

They say of me, and so they should, It's doubtful if I come to good. I see acquaintances and friends Accumulating dividends And making enviable names In science, art and parlor games. But I, despite expert advice, Keep doing things I think are nice, And though to good I never come Inseparable my nose and thumb.

You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

People Who Do Things exceed my endurance; God, for a man that solicits insurance!