A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.

Ducking for apples -- change one letter and it's the story of my life.

[Completely bored by a country weekend, wiring to a friend:] For heaven's sake, rush me a loaf of bread, enclosing saw and file.

Gertrude Stein did us the most harm when she said, 'You're all a lost generation.' That got around to certain people and we all said, 'Whee! We're lost.

Why is it no one sent me yet one perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it's always just my luck to get one perfect rose.

Authors and actors and artists and such - Never know nothing, and never know much.

People are more than fun than anybody.