Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation.

Accursed from their birth they be Who seek to find monogamy, Pursuing it from bed to bed— I think they would be better dead.

The Swiss are a neat and an industrious people, none of whom is under seventy-five years of age.

They say of me, and so they should, It's doubtful if I come to good.

If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you-- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.

All those writers who write about their own childhood! Gentle God, if I wrote about mine you wouldn't sit in the same room with me.