Never loan a book to someone if you expect to get it back. Loaning books is the same as giving them away.

With the first drink comes the truth, with the second drink comes wishful thinking, and with the third drink come the lies.

I am going to give you a piece of advice... advice I wish I'd been told in guidance class back in high school, in between the don't-do-acid and don't-drink-and-drive films. I wish our counselors had told us, 'When you grow older a dreadful, horrible sensation will come over you. It's called loneliness, and you think you know what it is now, but you don't. Here is the list of the symptoms, and don't worry—loneliness is the most universal sensation on the planet. Just remember one fact—loneliness will pass. You will survive and you will be a better human for it.

And any small moments of intense, flaring beauty such as this morning's will be utterly forgotten, dissolved by time like a super-8 film left out in the rain, without sound, and quickly replaced by thousands of silently growing trees.

I know it's not cat food, but what exactly is it that they put inside of tinned ravioli?

At least when you're young you're also stupid.

Destiny is what we work toward. The future doesn't exist yet. Fate is for losers!