You see the button with the guy with the tray, and you push it, and he arrives with a sandwich! And you think: "Yes! Yes! I control sandwich monkey! I live in magic land, magic land, magic land"

I've got better things to do than read rubbish about myself.

You exaggerate your own reactions.

Lots of comics try stuff out all year round, which is very sensible - I don't.

I have tried... believe me, I have tried to like rap music. It makes me feel so very, very old. I have tried to get home with the downies.

In my personal life, my family makes me laugh more than anybody; I think that is the same for everybody. I certainly hope it is.

I don't have lungs anymore! Just two spare bags that flew in under a bridge one day.