I do not walk around imaging myself to be intimidating or smart.

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.

I actually very rarely see comedy myself, and although I admire the work of some comics, it does come from all over, so I’ll get a charge out of some fiction writers and poets.

One thing that's coming up a lot is: are you as grumpy as you appear from this Black Books thing.

I find it incredibly boring when people are mean about some individuals, especially if the individual has no power. I can understand how someone deems it necessary if somebody is in power to tear them down - I think that's really crucial. I make a lot of mean jokes about myself; as a theme, suffering seems to me a very interesting thing for comedy, but not the suffering of a particular individual.

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it.

If you covered a broom handle with oil and shoved it up my arse, then put me on a trampoline, in a lift, I could write a better song on the walls.