No one's gonna give a damn in July if you lost a game in March.

The Chinese tell time by 'The Year of the Horse' or 'The Year of the Dragon.' I tell time by 'The Year of the Back' and 'The Year of the Elbow.' This year it's 'The Year of the Ulnar Nerve.' Someone once asked me if I had any physical incapacities of my own. 'Sure I do,' I said. 'One big one - Jim Palmer.'

Bad ballplayers make good managers, not the other way around. All I can do is help them be as good as they are.

My best game plan is to sit on the bench and call out specific instructions like 'C'mon Boog,' 'Get a hold of one, Frank,' or 'Let's go, Brooks.'

A manager's job is simple. For one hundred sixty-two games you try not to screw up all that smart stuff your organization did last December.

I became an optimist when I discovered that I wasn't going to win any more games by being anything else.

Optimism is the cheerful frame of mind that enables a teakettle to sing, though in hot water up to its nose.