I’d like to discover life. Quite frankly I don’t know how to be happy. I have not a clue. I only serve — and I don’t say that with any grandeur. I just serve others through entertaining. That’s when I am happy. I’m not just delighted with myself when I’m entertaining, but I’m happier than when I’m not.

I tell the truth, and it has gotten me into a lot of trouble. My dad used to say to me, 'If you tell the truth all day long, you will end up in jail.'

Diabetes is a lousy, lousy disease.

I never found anyone who could look after me as well as I could look after myself.

Onstage, nothing is as important as truth, nothing. As soon as you lie, they know it.

Why haven't I made more movies? Nobody asked me.

Betty White is probably a very nice woman.