[On Hollywood:] I had gone there expecting to see parties that reflected the stock-in-trade of the movies - glamour. Instead, I found the same attitude toward parties that European peasants had for baths. It was something to be done methodically every Saturday night.

Protocol may be defined as the code of etiquette which protects royalty from the competition of intellectual and social superiors.

Laugh at yourself first, before anyone else can.

Giving parties is a trivial avocation, but it pays the dues for my union card in humanity.

Most rich people are the poorest people I know.

Bores put you in a mental cemetery while you are still walking.

The secret of my success is that no woman has ever been jealous of me.