Owning your own home is America's unique recipe for avoiding revolution and promoting pseudo-equality at the same time.

We worship education but hate learning. We worship success but hate the successful. We worship fame but hate the famous.

Hereditary monarchy offers numerous advantages for America. It is the only form of government able to unify a heterogeneous people. Thanks to centuries of dynastic marriage, the family tree of every royal house is an ethnic grab bag with something for everybody. We need this badly; America is the only country in the world where you can suffer culture shock without leaving home. We can't go on much longer depending upon disasters like Pearl Harbor and the Iranian hostage-taking to "bring us together.

Americans are so emotionally fragile that soon we will have to be carried around in plastic bubbles and fed with an eye-dropper.

Real feminism is spinsterhood. It's time America admitted that old maids give all women a good name.

There's something unrefined about a reading woman, they always reek of the lamp. How can she grow up to be a lady if she's always got her nose in a book? Granny Rudin

Chinks in America's egalitarian armor are not hard to find. Democracy is the fig leaf of elitism.