[On the writers she admires:] I prefer dead writers, because I don't see them at parties.
Fran LebowitzI've never seen the Kardashians; I'm not sure who they are. But I know a lot about them because it's impossible not to.
Fran LebowitzThe only appropriate response to the question, 'Can I be frank?' is, 'Yes, if I can be Barbara.
Fran LebowitzCitizen's Band radio renders one accessible to a wide variety of people from all walks of life. It should not be forgotten that all walks of life include conceptual artists, dry cleaners, and living poets.
Fran LebowitzPeople are constantly telling me, whether they are friends who feel sorry for me, because I can't find a place to live, or real estate agents, "You can't afford an apartment the size you need with this many books. Why don't you just put some of your books in storage?" And I always say the same thing: "What if I told you I had four children? Would you say, 'You just can't afford to house four children. Why don't you just put two of them in storage?'" That's how I feel.
Fran Lebowitz