The first step in having any successful war is getting people to fight it.

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.

I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.

Whenever I am doing anything else, which is most of the time, even if it is not something like robbing a bank, I feel felonious. Writing is what I'm supposed to be doing.

People have been cooking and eating for thousands of years, so if you are the very first to have thought of adding fresh lime juice to scalloped potatoes try to understand that there must be a reason for this.

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies.