When it comes to sports I am not particularly interested. Generally speaking, I look upon them as dangerous and tiring activities performed by people with whom I share nothing except the right to trial by jury.

modern science was largely conceived of as an answer to the servant problem and ... it is generally practiced by those who lack a flair for conversation.

Will power is not telling anybody you quit smoking.

Bread that must be sliced with an axe is bread that is too nourishing.

Perhaps the least cheering statement ever made on the subject of art is that life imitates it.

Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is; the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.

A dog who thinks he is a man's best friend is a dog who obviously has never met a tax lawyer.