I write what I like to write. Those who like to listen to it, listen to it. And the ones who don't, watch football and drink beer, jog, go to discos and so forth. I never claimed to be a man for all seasons.

All that we got here is American made. It's a little bit cheesy, but it's nicely displayed.

Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?' Frank Zappa: 'You have a wooden leg. Does that make you a table?

It's raw, unbridled superstition for these people to claim that words can harm you.

Maybe you should stay with your mama, you're kind of stupid and ugly, too.

These girls wouldn't let just anybody spew on their vital parts, they wanted a guy from a group with a big hit song on the charts.

Call any vegetable and the chances are good that the vegetable will respond to you.