Fact of the matter is, there is no hip world, there is no straight world. There's a world, you see which has people in it who believe a variety of different things.

Don't go to bed with any woman crazier than you are.

Ever try to have a conversation with someone on drugs? It just doesn't work.

My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.

Hey, let's get serious... God knows what he's doin' He wrote this book here And the book says: 'He made us all to be just like Him', So... If we're dumb... Then God is dumb... (And maybe even a little ugly on the side)

She was a steady date until she put on some weight.

Stupidity is the basic building block of the universe.