In the order named, these are the hardest to control - wine, women and song.

Nobody can write such ironic things unless he has a deep sense of injustice-injustice to those members of the race who are victims of the stupid, the pretentious and the hypocritical.

Elections are won by men and women chiefly because most people vote against somebody rather than for somebody.

Ninety-two percent of the stuff told you in confidence you couldn't get anyone else to listen to.

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.

The rich man has his motorcar, His country and his town estate, He smokes a fifty-cent cigar And jeers at Fate. He frivols through the livelong day, He knows not Poverty, her pinch. His lot seems light, his heart seems gay; He has a cinch. Yet though my lamp burns low and dim, Though I must slave for livelihood- Think you that I would change with him? You bet I would!

Accustomed as I am to public speaking, I know the futility of it.